On my last post, I wrote about the metaphor the percussion band conductor used to express my progress.
He said that in order to get to the goodies in the garden (learning how to play music), I have to go through the corn field (my mental blockage – mostly being told all my life I can’t sing).
He said that each time I get to the garden, I start thinking and I got back at the other edge of the corn field and I have to go through it all over again and each time it is harder.
Today was a bad day as in I started it on the wrong foot. I got back on the right one, but I was already tired.
I still drag myself to go to the drumming class. I consider seriuosly not going next week so that I can work on the new project.
Due to the corona situation, I had some months in which having two jobs (one that I need, and one that I love) didn’t apply as in I had no deadlines on my love job and everything expanded to the point that I could experiment and turn the experiments in finished products, which in fact got me the amazing project I’m working on now. But now I do not have time for myself. I do not have time to think. All in all it is just like last summer. Only this time I am consumed by the right stuff. Now it is worth being tired.
Not suited for going at the drumming class, though. If I were just tired, I would be ok, but tired I cannot go through the corn field.
The thing is the people there are amazing. Felix is a person that can make anyone feel at ease and believe they can do anything … percussion related, at least.
Today, getting there I took in their energy and somehow, the first part of the rehearsal was amazing. I spent so much time in the garden, I know it is not boring. It is amazing to be part of something.
However, on the last part of the rehearsal, I got so tired I could not be there. So, Felix figured out a way to involve me anyway and because I was on the other side of the corn field with no intention to cross it again and they were in the garden, he had to ask me to sing louder so they can hear me…
…and by singing louder I got to be with them in the garden again.
It doesn’t make any sense to you, but it is so clear to me. Must make time for this no matter what.